Dear Diary,

If I could wake up in a different place, at a different time, could I wake up as a different person?

This is a question I use to ask myself. That is until I actually did wake up in a different place, in a different time and had to reinvent myself.

One day I was Kagome Higurashi. A simple school girl living at the Higurashi shrine in Tokyo. The next I had fallen down an ancient well and into the feudal era. I had become Lady Kagome. A powerful miko and protector of the Shikon no Tama.

Only… I wasn’t very good at protecting it. Thanks to me the poor jewel was shattered and scattered into thousands of tiny pieces all over Japan. Boy was Inuyasha ever pissed. I can’t say I blame him. We’ve spent the last three years of our lives trying to piece it back together. We can’t even move on and live normal lives like we want to because we have to make the jewel whole again.

But that’s not what this entry is about. My dear Diary, I tell you all of my secrets. I’ve told you about the love and lust I hold for a certain hanyou. I’ve told you about how much I fear the unknown. I’ve told you how much I care about my friends and all my hopes and dreams. But now I’m going to tell you how I’ve changed.

I use to be so different in so many ways. I wanted to go to college and become a doctor. I wanted to of course have a family someday, but that seemed so far away. First I wanted to finish school and have a career. That’s all changed now.

So what is it that I want? Well, I’ll tell you. I still want to finish high school. That’s really important to me. I also want to put the sacred jewel back together. Okay… If I was REALLY honest I wouldn’t be saying that. I don’t WANT to put the jewel back together, but I have to. I just want the journey to be over, you know? I want to move on with my life and reach my new goals.

What are my new goals? Well, first there is the seducing of a certain inu hanyou that I’m quite fond of. I’m sure I can do it too. I know he loves me though he’s never said it. Think about it… Would he really risk his life for me all those times if he didn’t love me? Sure he would if he wanted his shard detector, but I can see the emotion in his eyes when I’m captured or hurt. It doesn’t take a genius to figure Inuyasha out.

My next goal is to marry and become Inuyasha’s mate. I want that more than anything in the whole world. I always thought of myself of a modern independent woman, but now this is my home more than modern day Tokyo. I can totally see myself in a hut cooking and cleaning for him while he protects the village and surrounding forest. Which brings me to my next goal.

Children. Lots and lots of little puppy eared, golden eyed, silver haired children running around tugging at my apron strings. I can see them now, roughhousing around with Inuyasha on the floor of our hut and someday marrying and mating Sango and Miroku’s kids. Then we’ll officially be family.

I’d also like to learn more about herbs and healing from Kaede. Maybe someday I could take over as village miko for her. So maybe I can still work in the medical field. Just in a different time with different treatments.

But how have I changed personally? My goals aren’t the only things to change. Before I fell down the well I didn’t consider myself very brave. But as soon as Mistress Centipede attacked the village looking for me and the Shikon no Tama, I knew I had to suck it up. I found an inner strength I didn’t know that I’d possessed. I was still terrified though. I don’t get scared so easily now when faced with a demon. The only time I really get scared is when Inuyasha is hurt. I know he’s the same way. He’s so brave. And like me, the only time I’ve seen fear in his eyes is when I’m in danger.

Before all this started I had never seen death. I never experienced it either. Now I have done both. I have not only watched demons and humans die at the hands of others and my friends, but I have killed my fair share of demons as well. I never thought I could take a life, but I’ve found out that I could. I’ve even almost killed Inuyasha on at least two occasions.

As for experiencing death myself, yes Diary, that’s true too. When the band of seven killed me, Sango and Miroku I remember my soul waiting for my soul to be brought to the netherworld by the pallbearers. I remember I was still able to think and wondered if Kikyo would send her soul collectors after my soul. Or if maybe my soul would not go to the netherworld. Perhaps it would go to Kikyo, making her totally human again. I figured Inuyasha could truly be free and happy then. Like I said I know he loves me, but he’s confused over Kikyo still. I know it, he knows it. We all know it. He still needs some time.

If Kikyo’s soul collectors had come for me would Inuyasha destroy them or allow them to take my soul because it’s for Kikyo’s benefit? I honestly don’t know the answer to that question.

Back to the topic, some things about me remain the same though. I’m still shy and, I hope, a nice person. I go out of my way for my friends and love them like family. All of my friends are so important to me. I don’t know what I’d do without them. Even Koga and Hojo. Though they can both be annoying I know their heart is in the right place. Or at least Hojo’s is. Sometimes I wonder if Koga just says he loves me because it will piss off Inuyasha. Then again… He did ask me to be his mate before he knew I had any feelings for my favorite inu hanyou. Once he knew this though, his hatred for Inuyasha increased to massive proportions.

The two could easily TRY to kill each other and have. Yet they never manage to actually finish each other off. I know that Koga could never actually kill Inuyasha if he fought back. Not because he doesn’t have the guts, but because he doesn’t have the skill.

As for Inuyasha, he has both. The only reason they hadn’t killed each other, or at least the reason that I suspect, is because of me. Koga has to know that if he ever killed Inuyasha I could never and would never forgive or love him. Inuyasha on the other hand is different. He knows I would be hurt and angry with him, but that I would eventually forgive him because I love him. So, in retrospect, or at least how I see it, Koga doesn’t kill Inuyasha so that he won’t push me away. However, Inuyasha doesn’t kill Koga because he loves me and doesn’t want to see me sad and upset or angry.

But I’m getting way off point, aren’t I, Diary? This was supposed to be how different I am now that I’m travelling with my friends. However, it’s getting late and Inuyasha always insists on getting up at the crack of freaking dawn, so I’m going to have to go. Maybe tomorrow we can talk about this again.

Then again… Maybe not.

Until next time!

Kagome Higurashi.

"Hey Kagome! Are you done yet?!" Inuyasha asked finishing off his ramen.

Kagome sighed as she put down her pen and diary. "Yes Inuyasha. I’m done."

"Good. Then go to sleep. We have a long day tomorrow."

"We have a long day every day," Shippo complained.

"Hey! You’re the one who wanted to come with us after your father’s death was avenged!" Inuyasha pointed out.

Hoping to avoid a fight Kagome said, "All right you two. I’m going to bed now so please keep it down because Sango and Miroku are already asleep. Shippo, do you want to sleep with me or Kirara tonight?"

"You of course!"

Kagome smiled and unrolled her sleeping bag. She climbed in with Shippo and snuggled close to him.

As Kagome began to fall asleep she stared at Inuyasha. By now he had braced himself against a tree with his sword across his chest. His eyes were closed and his ears were drooping just slightly since he was sleeping. Or if he wasn’t he was falling asleep. Kagome couldn’t tell.

‘Someday my hanyou you WILL be mine. That I promise you.’ Kagome thought as sleep finally claimed the young miko.