Treaty Of A Thousand Tears
She begged for her savior with silent words, her heart pleading for his company as she knelt before the grave marker. She desperately pictured his golden orbs that shone with defiance, his silver hair that tumbled past his shoulders in straight strands, and his crimson robe that had been given to him during childhood. She wished for the warmth that his arms supported whenever he held her, wished for disobedient glint in his eye, and wished for the feeling of being safe and content under his watchful gaze. It was with this image that aided her through her long, thoughtful period; she felt as if she could feel the ghost of his presence looming over her, at her side despite the fact that he was miles away.
The thought offered her some solace as she mourned, yet his ghostly company was unsubstantial.
She needed him more than she needed to breathe. Her hand reached out to trace the physique of Kaede’s gravestone, unshed tears brimming in her eyes. The cool night air blanketed her shivering body in black, encasing her in the night’s gentle darkness. She shivered and pulled the blanket tighter against her body. It was times like this that she pleaded for Inuyasha’s company, and his robe of the fire rat; she could use both his intuition on the facts, and his support, as well as the warmth that his robe provided.
A grim smile reached her lips. Great. Now I’m relying on Inuyasha to give me solace to this pain? What kind of person am I? It’s only been a few months, and I’m still grieving while everyone’s moved on…Am I the only one who suffers from this? Why do I feel so alone?
“I wish you were here to help, Kaede,” Kagome whispered aloud. “I could use your moral support right about now. That, and your words of wisdom.”
“Kagome, what are you doing out here in the middle of the night? You’re going to catch a cold!”
She turned at the exasperation in Sango’s tone, and found the former demon slayer rushing to her side, a flustered Miroku at her heels.
“I needed some time to breathe,” Kagome explained to the panting couple. “I usually come out here every night to pay my respects to Kaede, and to get some air so that I could think. I’m sorry if I worried you; that wasn’t my intention.”
Sango released a relieved sigh. “It’s fine; we should’ve been keeping an eye on you, anyway.”
“I’m not a child.”
“No, you’re not,” Sango agreed, taking a seat beside her friend. “We don’t want you to get hurt, Kagome, now that you’re pregnant; think of what Inuyasha would say if he saw you out here. And alone, nonetheless!” She shook her head, mumbling under her breath.
“We were simply worried for your wellbeing,” Miroku added, wiping the sweat from his forehead. “Let me tell you, you gave us quite a scare; Inuyasha would’ve gone ballistic if he had been here.”
“But he’s not here, is he?” Kagome replied indignantly.
Sango and Miroku exchanged knowing glances at the tone of her voice, saying in unison, “Mood swings.”
Kagome’s shoulders slumped at their accusation for her rotten attitude. She sighed. “Sorry; I’m stressed up to my eyeballs. First there’s the pup, then there’s the jewel’s return, and Inuyasha leaving, alone, to find Kikyo…It’s hard to comprehend it all. I’m sorry I’m taking it out on you.”
Sango smiled sympathetically and draped an arm over Kagome’s shoulders. “It’s okay, Kagome; we’re just as stressed. But sitting out here in the cold is not going to do anything to solve our problems. Why don’t you come inside and eat something? You missed dinner, and you must be hungry.”
“I’m fine, thanks.”
Miroku frowned. “You’ve got to eat something, Kagome. If it’s not for you, at least do it for the baby.”
The future miko’s reply died on her lips as the reality of Miroku’s words set in. She knew he was right; she still had some control of the rational part of her brain. But there was a distilling presence that loomed in the pit of her stomach that refused to go away, and it made her uneasy. Somewhere, deep inside, was the notion that Inuyasha was in some sort of danger; that he need her help. Through the bond that linked the two together, she could feel his disgust, fear, and grief; endless, unrelenting grief that gripped her soul and squeezed. It unsettled her entire being, and more tears pooled in her eyes at the revelation.
Her hand drifted to her stomach where their child resided. Was the child blind to such grief, or could she feel her father’s pain, too? Suddenly, food became less of a problem.
Kagome never felt so alone.
“Are you sure you’re okay, Kagome?” Sango pressed, eyebrows furrowing in worry.
The girl in question broke through her reverie with the shake of her head, blinking against tears that slipped from the grasp of her eyelids. “Yeah, I’m fine,” she answered dazedly.
“Why are you crying, then?”
“Mood swings,” she lied, stifling a sob.
Sango nodded in understanding. “Just wait until you hit five months; after that, the mood swings don’t seem so bad. Now, let’s go back to the hut and get some food, okay? I made some porridge, and it tastes heavenly.”
“Give me a minute?” Kagome pleaded.
Sango sighed, but allowed Kagome to continue after receiving a sharp glance from her husband. Kagome smiled faintly and stroked the gravestone, relishing in the feeling of the material under her fingertips. “Rest in peace, Kaede,” she whispered almost inaudibly. “I wish you were here with us, to guide us. Please, watch over us, and over Inuyasha; he needs your wisdom more than ever. Thank you for everything you’ve done for us, Kaede; I miss you.”
..::OO::..
It was Inuyasha who pulled away first, his expression morphing into one of anger and disgust. Kikyo saw the conflicting emotions that warred within his amber orbs, and simply chuckled at the sight. Her amusement fell in the grief that lingered in his gaze; she knew that he could simply crumble from the pressure of guilt that weighed heavily on his shoulders. He had betrayed the one woman he pledged his love to, the woman he loved and mated with, and the undead priestess knew that he was at war with himself internally.
He was debating, she was pleased to see, on whether or not to tell Kagome of the kiss. A triumphant smirk tugged at her lips. This will surely send the girl running to the well, and Inuyasha running back to me, she thought. He can’t help but be honest with her; his honor is at stake, and he is bound to tell her eventually. I can only imagine the look on his face when he loses both his mate and unborn child in one day. I doubt she can be so good natured now as to forgive him. Being friendly with the enemy, huh? Let’s see how you deal with this one, Kagome…
“I’ve done what you’ve wanted,” Inuyasha said flatly, holding out the Shikon no Tama in the palm of his hand. “Now do what I want.”
“Very well, then.” She wrapped her hand around the jewel and concentrated, focusing her whole being on the purification of the one thing that drew she and Inuyasha apart fifty years ago. Pink light radiated from her fingers. Her miko powers merged with the jewel, bathing it in a bright pink light. But, instead of disappearing, it remained in Inuyasha’s palm, looking as if it had never been broken in the first place.
Kikyo pulled away, exasperated. “What is the meaning of this? It will not purify!”
“What do you mean?” Inuyasha demanded of her sharply, glaring at the jewel through narrowed eyelids.
“It…just won’t purify. I don’t understand this! W-what is going on? This has never happened before.”
Inuyasha was wondering the same thing, except with different emotions. “You tricked me,” he accused, fingering the jewel before concealing it in his robe. “I can’t believe I fell for that!”
“Inuyasha, I-”
“Don’t try to make up for what you did; I know what you were trying to do. To think that, for a split moment, I trusted you…” He shook his head and turned on his heel, beginning to walk away from her. “My mistake.”
Kikyo made no move to pursue him, but simply stood rooted to the spot, shocked.
“My threat still stands,” he admonished before disappearing into the cluster of trees.
..::OO::..
Kagome awoke in the middle of the night to soft footfalls outside her hut. Sitting up, she rubbed the sleep out of her eyes and peered through the darkness. Silence met her ears for a moment until a grunt shattered it. She nearly screamed when the reed flap was pushed out of the way by a dark figure.
Inuyasha stepped into the hut almost hesitantly, his eyes containing some sort of emotion that Kagome had no name for. When he realized that she was awake, he said, almost as if he was in a trance, “Oh, you’re up. Did I wake you?”
“No, I was awake.” She regarded him suspiciously before slowly wrapping her arms around his middle, burying her nose in his chest. He stiffened at her touch. “I was worried,” she admitted, voice muffled. “I had this…unsettling feeling that you were in trouble. Are you okay? She didn’t hurt you?”
He relaxed and returned the embrace, burying his nose in her hair. “I’m fine; thank you for worrying.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah,” he said, avoiding her eyes. “What about you? The pup didn’t give you any trouble, did she?”
Kagome almost giggled at him referring to the pup as a “she;” she found it cute. “She’s fine, Inuyasha; don’t worry. Are you tired? Hungry? Thirsty?”
“I’m fine.” His voice was flat; emotionless.
“Something happened between you and Kikyo. Am I right?”
He paled at her accusation, eyes going wide with surprise. Is it really that obvious? he questioned himself. “Yes,” he told her quietly, writhing in emotional pain.
She nodded. “I see. Are you going to tell me what happened, or should I assume the worst?”
Assume the worst and leave it at that. “You’re going to hate me.”
“Inuyasha,” she stressed, gazing up at him with tear-filled hazel eyes. “Inuyasha, I would never hate you. In fact, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to; I trust you. If you don’t want to talk, I won’t press you for answers.”
“No, I need to tell you this.” With a sigh, he gripped her shoulders and stared into her eyes intently. “I went to meet Kikyo, and I asked her if she could purify the jewel. She gave me one condition, and that was to kiss her. She tricked me, though; the jewel wouldn’t purify for her. After that, I left. Kagome, I’m sorry; I didn’t want to do anything with her, but I was thinking of the future and our pup and-”
Kagome laid a hand on his lips to silence his next few words. “It’s just one kiss, Inuyasha,” she said, smiling gently. “Like I said before: I trust you. What you did was noble, and I thank you for that. You put others before yourself, and even though the jewel wasn’t purified, at least you attempted to change the future. As for telling me about this…thank you, for your honestly; it makes me feel a whole lot better about this situation. And, we’ll figure out a way to get rid of the jewel; we’ll pull through like we always do. Just have faith in our abilities, okay?”
“You…forgive me?” he asked slowly, surprised by his mate’s choice of words.She snorted.
“Of course I forgive you; you’re my mate, after all.”
He pressed her to his chest, unmistakably happy with the outcome of his honesty. “Thank you, Kagome.”
“Anytime,” she replied, her voice a squeak.