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Story Notes:
i claim to own nothing and that includes InuYasha but I think I own the things that are currently in my possession.

Oh a very sad one shot song-fic. It's to the song Fade Away by Pain

Now on with the story. Much love for you all. Keva

XX

FADE AWAY

Sesshoumaru stood on the balcony of the small apartment; staring with unseeing eyes out over the horizon. Everything about where he was and who he now had to be was wrong; completely unsettling to the very core of his being. Something had to give.

The door to the small apartment opened quietly but he paid no mind to the being that just entered. He knew who it was; she was the only stability he had in an unfamiliar place he had no business existing in. How long had he been here now? A year? Maybe two? It didn’t matter how long he had been here for the first minute he came to be in this era was one minute too long.

“Sesshoumaru?” Kagome questioned from the balcony door. “Are you okay?” Kagome stared sadly at the demon lord. Oh how she wanted to take his pain away; give him back what he so desperately needed to once again become the Taiyoukai he once was.

For so long she searched and searched for a way to send him back to where he belonged; only to find that the well would refuse him as much as it refused her. It tore at her heart to know he was stranded here in her time with her as his only means of support. So many nights she cried for him wanting to remove the pain and fear; that he thought he hid so well, from him. Each time she would look into his eyes; eyes that were once so cold, cunning and full of life, her heart was ripped to shreds. Now those eyes were dull and held a lifelessness to them that threatened to rip her very soul from her body.

After the initial shock of him not being able to return to his home where he belonged; he submitted to his fate and really tried to adapt to his new life. She taught him the best she could in how this new world worked and he easily grasped most of the modern day principals. Working, paying your dues and so on. He even managed to learn to drive and got his license. She thought for sure that even though he was now stuck in this modern era he would eventually fall into the acceptance of it… but she was wrong.

His eyes always told her the truth of how he felt. There were none like him here; none, aside from her that understood who and what he was here. He was always looked at with hooded eyes that spoke of curiosity and slight fear but never acceptance. His markings, his hair, his eyes, and the air about him screamed that he wasn’t part of the human race and that he did not belong here.

Press my face in the dirt
See how long I can hold my breath
Pour some salt in my wounds
I am just someone who doesn't
Fit in your world

Kagome stepped up behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist. “I wish I could send you back.” She whispered as the tears she couldn’t hold back spilled from her eyes.

Sesshoumaru continued to stare out over the horizon as he placed his right hand over the two small hands clasped around his waist. Her tears sickened him but at the same time saddened him. He knew she wept for him; almost daily, and he also knew that she was still searching for a way to send him back. She had given up her life for him; he could see it in her eyes.

She always looked tired; with dark circles under them, she was hardly ever eating as he could practically see her bones poking through her skin. Her eyes didn’t shine like they used to and even her hair was dull and flat. She was dying… for him.

How can I smile with your gun to my head
How can I reach out when you're holding me back
I am just so tired of everyone who's trying to save me
Just save yourself...

“Kagome”

Her arms tightened around his waist in response; along with a small sniffle.

“You must eat and rest.”

He could feel her tears wetting the back of his shirt as she gripped him even tighter; almost as if she were afraid to let him go lest he disappear. Which sometimes he wished he would just vanish into nothingness.

Fade away
I wanna fade away

“I can’t.” She moved around to stand in front of him. She locked her tear filled blues with his empty gold and placed her hand on his striped cheek. “I can send you back.”

Shock flashed through his empty gold; so fast that she didn’t even see it. “No” He stated coldly as he pulled her hand from his face.

He could see the truth in her eyes as to what she would have to do to save him. He would not allow it; perhaps when he first came to be in this era he would have, but not now. She had done so much for him; since he came to be here, that he couldn’t take her life as well. He’d rather gut himself with his own claws.

You give me your hand, I don't want it
I'll rather drown on my own
You try to give me relief, I don't need it
I'll rather put the gun to my head

“I have to.” She whispered; dropping her head so that he couldn’t see her pain. “You… you…” She sniffed and watched with blurry eyes as her tears fell to the floor like rain.

Sesshoumaru reached out, placed a hooked finger under her chin, and lifted her face up. “I will not allow it.” He growled. “Fate has already tied my life to this place.” He removed his finger from her chin and raised his eyes to look back out to the darkening horizon. “I will die here.”

Bitterness is calling inside
I am already damned

Kagome’s bottom lip quivered as she stared up at the stoic being in front of her. “Sesshoumaru” She whispered. When he wouldn’t look down at her or even acknowledge her in the slightest; she reached out, grabbed his hand, and placed it flat against her chest.

Sesshoumaru quickly looked down at her. How was it he didn’t even notice when she came in such close proximity to his being? It had to be he was so lost in his thoughts that he failed to notice or his instincts were severely lacking. He was sure it was the former. “I will not allow it.”

“It’s too late.” She whispered. “I have to do this for you… for me.” Once again she move into him and wrapped her arms around his waist. “I am to blame for your being her and I have to fix my mistake.”

The fire in my soul is slowly dying
You know destiny calls my name

Kagome watched in horror as the battle between the demon lord and her arch nemesis drew ever closer to where she was standing. She wanted to run, to get out of the way; but if she did they would have surely destroyed her only way home, and she could not let that happen.

As the two fighting beings drew ever closer to her she attempted to use her powers to protect herself and the well; only to make things worse.

The well reacted to the rise in her powers with a pulsing blue light. Kagome failed to notice the well’s activity and continued to build up her powers. Then it all happened suddenly in a flash of chaos.

Naraku shot several tentacles out towards the demon lord causing him to dodge them. That was his fatal mistake as his movement brought him much too close to the well and before anyone could blink he and Kagome were gone.

Fade away

Sesshoumaru could easily feel her body slowly growing cold through his clothing. “Stop this.” He ordered in his deep stoic lordly voice; a voice he hadn’t used since he first came to be in this era.

“I’m sorry.” Kagome whispered with a shiver. “It’s too late to stop it.” She coughed and gripped onto him tighter. “By morning you will be back where you belong.” She buried her face into his chest and let her silent tears fall. “I want to do this.” She whispered into his chest.

I wanna fade away

Sesshoumaru looked down at the top of her head and glared deadly at her; but it was a lost cause as she couldn’t see him. He knew she was right; no matter how much he didn’t want her to do it, it was too late… she would be dead before the first twilight.

Kagome tilted her head up. “Sesshoumaru”

He looked down at her; trying not to get sucked into her soul wrenching sorrow; only to fail as his heart of ice shattered into a million little ice crystals.

“I love you.”

Sesshoumaru leaned down and pressed his lips to hers and flinched slightly when her ice cold lips touched his. He crushed her small frame to him with his one powerful arm at the same moment he plunged his tongue deep into her little cavern. He didn’t care if he won or lost this battle as he just wanted to be there for her in this moment.

The kiss was deep, passionate, loving, and soul searing. Sesshoumaru slowly and reluctantly broke the kiss for much needed oxygen. “Goodbye Kagome.” He whispered and placed a gentle kiss upon her forehead.

Kagome watched wide eyed as Sesshoumaru fell to his knees, gasped for breath once more, and fell to the floor before he vanished from site.

Fade away

Kagome fell to her knees and buried her face into her hands; sobbing like a child. A few moments later she threw her head back and released a soul ripping scream. He gave her his life so that she would live in his place… alone without him.

She stared at the spot where he once stood and a rage like she had never felt before exploded throughout her body. “SESSHOUMARU!” She held her fists above her thrown back head. “DON’T LEAVE ME ALONE!!” She dropped her head and hands. “I don’t want to live without you.” She whispered as fresh tears rolled down her cheeks and spilled to the floor.

I wanna fade away

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