AN-Please read my profile for a note on “Creed of the Other Breed” and future stories. The change in formatting to the previous chapters is due to the editing, so much thanks to Wiccan for cleaning up! I didn’t want to re-upload so many chapters individually. Also, there is a lemon warning for this chapter. It is marked with (&).

Chapter Twenty-nine

Sesshoumaru rolled over, yawning widely in the shaft of sunlight that streamed into the room from the narrow window slant above his head. Snuggled up to his side, Kagome stirred before lapsing back into sleep. A quick glance at the clock just barely visible around the shoji screen as it sat atop the dresser revealed that it was close to eight a.m.. He cursed. “Kagome.” Sesshoumaru softly shook his mate. “I need to change your bandage.” He was over an hour late on the first changing.

He knew she didn’t blame him. Intellectually he understood that it was the doctor’s fault that she had taken ill. That didn’t stop him from feeling responsible, however. It was the youkai way to care for one’s mate, but more importantly, it was his desire to see to her health. There would be many years together if she was not taken from him prematurely by illness or disease. Still, those years would not be enough. Not nearly enough.

“Sesshoumaru, can’t it wait a little?” Kagome asked from his side. A slender arm slid over his waist, and she nestled her head under his chin.

“You know it cannot. The doctor was most specific,” he admonished gently, in no mood to ruin her good mood with a preemptory tone. Last night had been incredible, and he was feeling abundantly indulgent in the after-morning. That didn’t mean he’d let her get away with avoiding the necessary business of taking care of her. He got out of the warm cocoon of their bed to retrieve the medical supplies from the bathroom.

Acquiescing to his demand, Kagome rolled over onto her stomach when he came back. “Thank you.” She peeked at him from the corner of her eye as he paused at the task.

“For what?” he asked curiously. Hopefully it was not for what he thought. Surely he should be the one thanking her. In his youthful, lust-frustrated years, he had never imagined that there would be a sensual goddess awaiting him in the future.

She giggled, correctly guessing his confusion. “Not that, you!” She folded her arms and laid her head atop them as he resumed numbing the area before cleaning it. “For taking care of me, Sesshoumaru. You do it so well, you know? I wish there was something I could do for you.”

Surprised, Sesshoumaru felt the area around the wound for tenderness before dousing it in antiseptic. “You do enough, Kagome, just by being yourself.”

Somehow, she knew he’d say that. He was so arrogant about everything else, not to mention to everyone else. Yet, he wasn’t that way about them. There was no assumption in their relationship that she was a burden nor anything of the like. He truly felt that she, just by accepting him, merited anything he could give. It made her so terribly sad. A proud creature such as he shouldn’t sell himself short simply because he was accustomed to being told he was undesirable as a mate or lover.

In many ways, he suffered from an incredibly low self-esteem in that area. Put him in a business suit and he dominated. Take him to the gym and he’d show up anyone who dared challenge him. Put a sword in his hand-well, she hadn’t seen that yet, but she just knew he’d achieved perfection in that as well. There was nothing he couldn’t do. She was sure of it.

Give him a woman, however… He was an incredible lover. Not that she had anything to compare him with, but that was of no consequence. She certainly didn’t need it to know how good he had made her feel. He was kind and considerate of her feelings. Yes, he was domineering, but in a good way. She’d poke her own eye out before admitting it to him, however. She still got twitchy when he began giving orders, but he never did it simply to ‘prove who was boss.’

Sesshoumaru bossed her around all right, but it was for her own good. Had he said such a thing to her, she would have hissed like a cat. That didn’t stop her from admitting it to herself, though. She was honest to a fault when it came to self-reflection. Sesshoumaru, however… He needed to know that she didn’t want to simply be a recipient of his gratitude, as much as that word irked. She wanted to be an equal partner in their relationship.

“From now on, I want to help you dry your fur after baths,” she blurted out. She’d seen the look in his eyes, the brief hesitation. She’d kill to get him over the way he hid his ‘fault,’ too. At least with her.

He finished taping the clean gauze to her soft skin. “You will grow tired of it soon enough, Kagome. It is a tedious task; one I do not expect you to partake in.” Better to allow that a misguided sense of duty to him, given her need to keep things ‘even’ between them, was behind the offer. The vivid memory of her fingers gliding through his fur, her obvious fascination with the thick strands, soon had his skin itching to feel them again. Perhaps, he mused in contradiction to his previous thought, she would enjoy it? Maybe as much as he did?

Rolling onto her back, unmindful of her nudity, Kagome slapped him on the chest. “Don’t do that!”

Taken aback, Sesshoumaru stared down on her. “I was merely-”

She cut him off with a wave of her hand. “I know what you were doing. You would rather not expect anything of me. You can’t be disappointed, then, if I don’t ante up. Right?” She sighed. He loved her, but what would it take to make him see that she wanted him to need her as much as she did him? “I know I can depend on you. I think it’s tedious to change bandages, go clothes shopping, and balance my bank account. Yet you are doing these things for me. Do you regret offering, or in some cases, commandeering those tasks?”

His answer came instantly. “No.” A sinking feeling began to build up in his gut as logic dictated where she was taking this.

“Why do you want to help me, Sesshoumaru?” she asked, almost pleadingly. “Is it so that I depend on you and will be less likely to leave you?”

He shook his head. “I know you would never leave me once committed. I would not have put my trust in you by claiming a place by your feet if I felt you would be so fickle.”

“Then why?”

Kagome shifted until she was kneeling in front of him on the bed. Grasping his hands, she guided his arms around her waist and leaned into the warmth of his body. “I want to please you as well, Sesshoumaru. And not just in bed,” she added when he opened his mouth. He clamped his lips together. “Did you like it when I helped you last night?”

When he hesitated, no doubt trying to formulate a reply that wouldn’t give away the truth but wouldn’t be a lie either, Kagome pinched him. “Sesshoumaru!”

“No one has ever helped me before,” he admitted by way of an answer. “I have always taken care of myself. I am unsure how to handle becoming accustomed to another’s aid.”

Shocked, she pulled back to gauge his expression only to find his golden eyes staring blankly at the wall. “Your mother…?” He didn’t reply, and Kagome’s heart clenched. Recent events aside, his mother had a few words coming for her treatment of Sesshoumaru. She had a sinking suspicion he wasn’t only talking about help with his fur, either. Had there never been anyone to watch his back, to stand by his side and offer a shoulder to lean on? “I’m your mate, Sesshoumaru. If you can’t depend on me, then who can you?”

Just the thought of losing her caused the discomfort in his gut to intensify into an all-consuming pain. Pain he hadn’t felt since receiving her Vow. Kagome’s wide eyes stared, frightened, at him as she called his name, but he couldn’t hear it above the roaring in his ears. “Kagome,” he whispered as his muscles locked and bone shifted. From within him, he could feel the reiki rising to calm him as it battled with the youki of his soul.

Afraid for him, unsure what was going on, Kagome threw herself after him when he fell off the bed. Knees hit the ground hard, but she ignored the sharp pain to scramble over to his side and turned him over. She gasped as his body heated beneath her very hands. It soon became painful to hold him as his skin flushed hotly, but she refused to let go. “Sesshoumaru, tell me what to do!” He wasn’t shifting; this was almost as if he was in the middle of a seizure!

The echo of her plea reached him, but Sesshoumaru was helpless to reply. The anguish at the thought of losing her, even in the hypothetical future, was compounded a thousand fold by their mating. His youki howled within his body. Had he ever any doubt before about the strength of his feelings for her, this pain would have put it to rest. It had been rumored that those lucky enough to find the one who could rouse their youki to seduce were also cursed to die with their mate.

He could well believe it now. Oddly enough, that fact served to restore a measure of calm to him. She would die in penance to her mortality, but he would not be forced to suffer through his immortality without her.

Wiping her tear-streaked cheeks clean, Kagome peppered his chin and cheeks with kisses when he managed to sit up within the embrace of her arms. “Are you okay?” she asked. “What happened? Do you need anything?”

“I will be fine,” he managed to croak out, wincing at the weak sound as the memory of pain still reigned sharp in his mind. “It was just a bit of nonsense.”

“Nonsense!” she yelled. If he wasn’t already on the ground, she’d, well, she’d do something! “What the hell does that mean!” It was a measure of her upset that she swore.

Chuckling huskily, spirit lighter than he could recall it ever being, he darted forward and claimed her lips in a searing kiss. He pulled back and smirked into her bemused expression. “I simply realized that, when the time comes, I will die with you.”

She blinked rapidly. “But, I thought-” She struggled to understand. “Sesshoumaru, you are youkai. You’re going to live centuries longer than I will. Remember?” Had the sudden fever damaged his faculties?

Startling happy for a person who had just declared their lifetime sheared into a mere fraction of its potential, Sesshoumaru shrugged as he helped her to her feet alongside him. “It will be my will to follow you into death. There is nothing else here for me. Just the thought of losing you, of being here in life without you, was agony. I would not survive it, in truth.”

Kagome legs fell out from beneath her. If it hadn’t been for his support, she would have crumbled on the floor. This was so much to take in at once! They had gone from a wonderful night to talking about death? “Why-” She stopped herself to tug him to sit beside her. Instead, he sat on the floor and assumed the position by her feet. She took a deep breath before trying again. “You can’t die, Sesshoumaru, not for me! I want you to live and be happy in life.”

He smiled, an oddly understanding gesture that was at odds with the fierce burning gaze. “What will you do if I die?”

She gasped. The mere thought was enough that tears built up once more behind her eyes. What would she do if he died? She couldn’t imagine a life without him now. There was Souta to consider, but she couldn’t build her life around him. He was ready to go out on his own. Nor could she depend upon her mother anymore. Her grandfather was on his last legs of life as well. What, really, would she have to hold her here if Sesshoumaru died?

She knew, in the deepest recesses of her heart, that there could never be another like her Sesshoumaru. With him as her ideal, there were none who could compare. Just the thought of trying to replace him with another caused a sharp stabbing pain in her chest.

“Is this the mating bond?” she asked in a hushed whisper. She wrapped her arms around his neck and squeezed tightly. “I cannot, could not, see life without you, Sesshoumaru.” Some would say it wasn’t healthy. After all, where would she and her brother have been if her mother had willed herself to die along with her father? Shouldn’t she want to live, even if only to keep him alive in her memories? Life was a precious thing. To just stop living…

Easily breaking her hold, he twisted about and pulled her over his shoulder and into his lap. Sighing into her hair, Sesshoumaru explained, “Just as there are some aspects of human biology that are not yet understood by all, youkai have secrets that science has yet to discover answers for. There is a myth among youkai, one that is substantiated only through the personal experiences of a few as told to my mother‘s people, about Youki Mates.”

His mother had been oddly detached when she recounted the tale to him. Izayoi had just been brought to the manor, and she had been drinking heavily before he showed up to report on her investments. Out of the blue, she had interrupted him to ask if he knew what Youki Mates were. Celestial youkai were superior researchers and had delved into the history of youkai in order to better understand their more bestial relatives. Privately, he had always wondered if his mother hadn’t been envious of the inu nature she had been unable to emulate successfully.

He had been uninterested but had remained silent as she recounted a tale of oddly-bound mates that a celestial guru had professed to have communicated with while in a trance. At the time, he had simply allowed her to drone on out of pity for her destroyed pride. He had wondered if she had hoped, in a perverse way, that his father and Izayoi were Youki Mates. At least, then, she could save face in the knowledge that it was that, and not her, that had failed her own mating bond.

“Youki Mates?” Kagome scrunched her brows. “I’ve never heard of that. Is it like soul mates?”

Watching her carefully, Sesshoumaru stroked her nude back. “There is no human equivalent. The term soul mates tends to imply an outside force, like the kamis, creating two beings that are the perfect foil for each other.” His gaze turned inward as he recounted what he knew. “Youki Mates are, supposedly, nothing more than two beings that come together in mutual need and desire.”

He continued, “Yet, they are so much more. I have never heard of it happening between a human and a youkai, and it has only been rumored to have occurred four times in the history of youkai. The fact that my youki acted to bring you to me is not unheard of. It has happened instinctively to other poison youki with strong auras. However, given that it had not begun its seduction until I came to the conscious decision to pursue the possibility of a permanent bond with you, rather than upon my personal admission of being physically being attracted to you, I am inclined to now believe it was more of a side-effect.”

Kagome bit her bottom lip as she contemplated the situation. “How could it tie our lives together so closely that neither of us could live without the other?”

He smirked. “I am surprised you must ask that.”

She stared helplessly up at him. “I am trying to understand. It’s just a lot to wrap my brain around. I’ve never even heard of this before.”

Losing his smirk, Sesshoumaru’s hand glided from her back to rest upon her shoulder and he pulled her against his bare chest. “Love, Kagome. For some it is just a word. An expression of emotion or devotion. Depending upon who utters it, it can be meaningless, or it can mean the world. For us, for Youki Mates, it is a tangible force that now ties us together irrevocably. Hopefully, if what I know is correct, we will be bound until the earth rots and the sun implodes.” He took a deep breath, inhaling slowly as her soul, nestled within his youki, fluttered reassuringly. “I believe it to be so.” Everything within him resounded with the truth of the statement.

Frustrated that he was so calm while she still floundered in the dark, Kagome scowled. “That’s very romantic, I suppose, but I still don’t understand! You‘re going to die with me, and we‘ll then be reincarnated together or something?”

Laughter rumbled out of his chest before he could halt it. She looked so endearingly flustered. “Reincarnations are not the same as their incarnates. That only involves a transfer of human souls. They are more like the life-force that serves to provide the capacity for life. It is our memories, our life experiences and the like, that make us into the individuals that we are, human and youkai alike. Having the same soul as another does not mean you are that person. Youkai do not have souls, per se, but are composed of energy, our youki. Even after death, it does not pass on to another unless we will it, or it is stolen by a stronger youkai. As Youki Mates, we will leave our physical bodies behind in death, but we, Sesshoumaru and Kagome, will still exist together.”

Startled, she gaped. “Like ghosts?”

He quirked a brow. “If you want to look at it in such a way, I suppose it would not be completely off the mark. Our essences, your soul and my youki, our memories of each other and our life… We would still remain intact as we were in life. Just not bound by corporeal bodies.”

Paling as understanding came, Kagome whispered, “True immortality. That’s what it would be.” And then, her heart began to beat madly within her chest as another truth came to her. “Together,” she breathed out incredulously. They wouldn’t really be dying, but moving on to another plane of existence. Together.

Would there be others there? Would it be like ghosts, where they would have odd powers over this world? So many questions crowded her mind, but Kagome shoved them away. She took few short breaths and then a long one before saying, “Okay. I understand.” She glanced to the claws resting on her shoulder before adding, “And, while I’m probably going to drive you crazy speculating, I’m okay with it. I have no intention of giving up this life I have with you before I have to, but-” she smiled lovingly up at him “-it makes me, I don’t know, relieved, happy even; to know that, when our time is up here, we’ll move on together.”

He nodded in agreement. “Always.” Breaking the serious atmosphere, Kagome squirmed in his lap. His lips twisted wickedly and she shrieked as he lightly slapped her bare bottom. “Now, about that wish,” he uttered in silky tones that skated along her nerves like hot lava.

“Oh, no you don’t!” she cried out as his fingers slipped down to find where she burned. “You distracted me, but we are going to talk about your issues with me doing for you before you get near this body!”

“I am already near,” he huskily drawled. “What I want is in.” Accentuating his words with action, a single finger slid across her steadily moistening center before dipping inside. “As for the other, you may do whatever you like. I would never refuse you. Just remember that I will take that same liberty with you.”

Groaning into his neck, she bit down on his shoulder as he began to rub his arousal against the curve of her bottom while his finger slid home and began to tease her with short, smooth thrusting motions. “Not good enough,” she panted out. “You’ve got to tell me what you want too. Ask me, Sesshoumaru. Tell me what you want,” she said, practically purring the last bit as he eased his aching flesh between her thighs after removing his finger from her clenching channel to flick her sensitive bud. She locked her legs together, refusing to allow him the entrance his body asked for until he agreed.

Frustrated with her insistence, unwilling to forestall the inevitable, Sesshoumaru surrendered. “Love me, Kagome. Show me how to take what you so willingly offer, and I will.”

She moaned into his mouth as his lips descended upon her after his declaration, but she stubbornly held on. When his head lifted and she took in much-needed air, she demanded, “What do you want, Sesshoumaru?” Squirming in his lap, she brushed her fingers across the weeping tip of the arousal that peeked between her thighs. “Tell me!” He had every right to ask of her what would please him, in this and in every other aspect of their life together. Just as she did him. There might be times when they may both refuse, but it would only strengthen their bond to understand that asking was never wrong.

“You,” he growled out fiercely as his blood swirled with need and his youki burned, “I want you on your knees before me, begging me to take you. I want to press you into the ground, cover you with my body until I surround you as completely as you do my shaft. I want you hard and fast; I want to take you as the beast that I am.” Breathing heavily as the admission was torn from him, he was rewarded by the heat that began to seep from her now-dripping center.

&&&&&&

Nipples puckered instantly as his words registered. Kagome’s eyes drooped in sensual delight at the picture his need crafted in her mind. “Your wish is my command,” she purred before sliding forward. Dropping out of his lap, she grabbed a throw off the bed and tossed it on the cold floor before crawling on all fours onto it.

Aware of his burning eyes following her progress, she added an inviting wiggle to her bottom. Once she was situated on the blanket, she arched her back and glanced at him over her shoulder. The crimson eyes that stared back at her fanned the flames of her desire into an unimaginable agony of pure want. She licked her lips, watching as his eyes caressed her slick folds, bared to his gaze, with blatant lust. A surge of warmth tucked into her stomach and she could feel a slow trickle of moisture begin its arduous slide down her inner thigh.

“Please,” she begged shamelessly as he continued to stare, no longer simply willing to play along, “come to me, Sesshoumaru. I need you deep inside me.”

A terrible rumbling growl burst from his throat and he was upon her instantly. Pushing her head to the ground, he buried his tongue as far as it could go within her wet channel. She shrieked at the unexpected move, but the surge of moisture that answered his call belied the verbal reprimand. Slithering within her, his long tongue lapped up her honey voraciously as he gripped her thighs, partially lifting her from the ground while he buried his nose within her folds and devoured her.

The sounds of his feast echoed around them; sucking, licking, the light smacking of flesh against flesh and the music of her mewling pants coupled with their lusty moans. Unable to withstand the onslaught, she climaxed within minutes. Shivering, muscles trembling, her arms collapsed beneath her, and Sesshoumaru moved to mount her completely at her total submission.

“Yes,” he hissed out as his nipped her neck and shoulder. The scent of her honey carried to her on his breath as it brushed her face. She moaned, shivering in renewed arousal. “Mine,” he growled possessively as his taut flesh, hard and heavy, slid into her still spasming channel. “Mine.”

“Yours,” she answered breathlessly at the sensation of being filled so completely, so wonderfully, “Only yours. Always yours,” she panted as he began to take her as promised, hard and deep.

Cheek pressed into the floor, arms spread above her head as he relentlessly pounded into her with a rhythm she never had a hope of keeping, Kagome felt her climax built up again with frightening intensity.

Sesshoumaru felt it too, the quivering of the muscles that surrounded him with delicious heat. He growled inarticulately, gnashing his teeth as he fought to hold on to fall over the edge with her. His hips surged faster, skin slapped wetly against skin as his sac tightened painfully.

“Sesshoumaru!” she cried out as her release burst upon her, sweat-slick flesh shivering as her eyes rolled back in her head and her honey flowed down his arousal to soak his fur until it glistening in the morning light.

Gripping her spasming body, he surged forward once last time. Roaring out her name with his release, Sesshoumaru fell over her body, caging her to him as his muscles clenched, rolling and coiling uncontrollably as his vision went red.

&&&&&&&

The pair laid gasping for breath, and still draped over her back, Sesshoumaru reached forward to claim the box that yet laid on the floor where it had been left the night before. He had taken it out to inspect while Kagome slept.

She caught his movement and smiled as she looked at him over her shoulder. “Time for a wish?”

He smirked at her still breathless tone, but nodded.

She clenched heretofore unknown muscles, the exact ones that held him so snugly within her, as he toppled them over to rest on their sides and spooned her smaller body with his large frame. He handed the jewel to her. “What do you want?” she asked seductively as his arms wrapped tightly about her body, protecting her from the hard floor.

Power crackled around his form as Sesshoumaru’s smirk turned wicked. “Did you not already promise to give me whatever I want?”

She nodded, understanding. “You want me to word it exactly like that?”

“Yes. The wish will be then under my control, and I can ensure that it will be interpreted correctly.”

Connected to Sesshoumaru, Kagome could feel a faint pulse within the jewel that hadn’t been there before. Instinctively knowing what to do, she willed the power of the jewel to rise, just like her aura. It answered the call, blanketing them in a pink glow. “I wish for Sesshoumaru to have whatever he wants.”

Taking control as the power swarmed into his blood, wording his request wisely, since he had contemplated the possibilities last night while staring at the peaceful visage of his mate, Sesshoumaru made his wish.

“I wish that Noriko would now be free to live the life she desires.”

With a flash of light that nearly blinded the pair, the jewel winked out of existence.