Penname: Lupi [Contact] Real name: Ashley
Member Since: 18 Aug 2007
Membership status: Member
Bio:

DeviantArt - http://f4i.deviantart.com
SheezyArt - http://lupi.sheezyart.com
Fanfiction.Net - http://www.fanfiction.net/~werewolfoffire
Mediaminer.Org - http://www.mediaminer.org/user_info.php/104754


 Real Name: Ashley (Though you can call me Lupi/Woffy/F4I)

Gender: Female

Lives: Sydney, Australia

Hobbies: Drawing, writing, designing stuff, reviewing, reading

Fav Animes/Movies/Books: Beyblade, Harry Potter, Loveless, Sukisyo, Kyo Kara Maou, Inuyasha, Princess Princess, Naruto, Full Metal Alchemist, MAR: Marchen Awakens Romance

Favourite Characters: Sesshomaru, Rin, Jaken, Kouga, Naraku, Jinenji

Favourite Couples: Ryuukossei/Sesshomaru, Inuyasha/Sesshomaru, Inutaisho/Sesshomaru, Miroku/Sesshomaru, Kouga/Sesshomaru, Kohaku/Rin, Naraku/Sesshomaru, Kouga/Shippo

Disliked Characters: Kagome, Kikyo.


If you haven't noticed, yes, I am a rampant uke!Sesshomaru fangirl. However, I am picky as to what fics I read with him in it. So many people make him so OOC I wish to hurl myself off a cliff. ==; Anyway... I love yaoi (again, you probably noticed), just as I love the thought of having powerful people dominated.

I take requests, though I usually like to have something done in return. Usually. If you're completely against making me something, I'll still make you it. Just ask away. Though I would prefer if you emailed me with it; not reviewed. I like keeping both seperate.


Love for uke!Sesshomaru
Beta-reader: No
[Report This]
Reviews by Lupi
You Do The Math by MomoDesu Rated: PG-13 starstarstarstarhalf-star [Reviews - 3]
Summary: Everyone has a fantasy. (drabble)
Categories: General
Characters: None
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 265 Read Count: 1857
[Report This] Published: 30 Aug 2007 Updated: 30 Aug 2007
Reviewer: Lupi Signed starstarstarstar
Date: 31 Aug 2007 Title: Chapter 1: You Do The Math

... XD

I saw something like that coming, but it didn't make me halt my giggles! Inuyasha's so cute when he's annoyed and attempting to be nasty. He doesn't pull it off all too well though, all he seems is a bit rude.

This was very cute. Both Kagome and Inuyasha are in character and I'm quite happy to see that there aren't any spelling/grammatical errors. Really well done. ^_^ The only way I see you improving this is if you added a bit more description. But still, this is really good.

Lovely work! 

- Lupi



Author's Response:

Thanks! I'm glad you liked it.

The only reason it's as short is because there was a 250 word max, being written for a contest community and all. There was a lot more to it and I had to shave it down. That always hurts so bad to do!

 

-MD 

The Talk by Taiyoukai_Nile Rated: G starstarstarstarhalf-star [Reviews - 4]
Summary: Sango briefly muses over Miroku and finally has her say.
Categories: General
Characters: Sango
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 842 Read Count: 1728
[Report This] Published: 09 Sep 2007 Updated: 09 Sep 2007
Reviewer: Lupi Signed starstarstarhalf-star
Date: 16 Sep 2007 Title: Chapter 1: The Talk

Hmm... I like that this was in character; you find quite a few OOC Inuyasha fics on the net. So it's a relief. Much like I'm really happy to see that you've actually got good spelling and grammar; I don't know how many fics I read in a day that are just wrought with mistakes and it annoys me greatly (I edit whilst reading without meaning to, so many mistakes are very distracting). But this isn't like them, it possesses good English. I salute you for it.

I think you could make this better by adding description to it. I'm an avid fan of clear pictures. This seems like a skeleton to me, with Miroku, Sango and other character's actions and reactions and thoughts, however, nothing else seems to be there to draw out my imagination. Not that you didn't put any in at all, you have description like so: "his dark blue eyes full of concern", but there's a lot still left in the air. The part where Sango blushes because she thinks about talking to Miroku had me confused for this reason. Was Sango blushing brightly, as though her face had turned into a tomato? Or were her cheeks sprinkled with pink? 

Anyway, it was an interesting read. I like the thought of Sango confronting Miroku on his hand and it's bad habits. Gives me something to think about. Again, you've got great grammar and spelling, and the characters are in character (thank the heavens!), though your description needs work. Well done, keep writing. ^_^

- Lupi

Unwanted Desire by RogueSpike Rated: NC-17 starstarstarstarhalf-star [Reviews - 2]
Summary: A one shot Sesshomaru/Inuyasha from Sesshomaru's POV. Sort of a look at what the pairing would be like without the excuse that demons don't care about incest.
Categories: Romance, Adult > Yaoi, Romance > Other
Characters: Inu Yasha, Sesshoumaru
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 7073 Read Count: 1450
[Report This] Published: 22 Sep 2007 Updated: 22 Sep 2007
Reviewer: Lupi Signed starstarstarhalf-star
Date: 27 Sep 2007 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Hmm... I'm kind of ambivalent towards this. In one hand, I love it for your Sesshomaru voice in some parts, however, there are things that annoy me as well.

The ICness was almost there. So close and yet, with some parts - to me at least - it didn't sound Sesshomaru like at all. For example:

"With that one, I had to wonder if the defiance came from bravery or stupidity, for she seemed to be under the impression that no matter what she did, I would not harm her." - That was incredibly Sesshomaru. I read it and was wowed. Because it is what Sesshomary would think. He is Lord. He is Sesshomaru. No one should dare to defy him, let alone a weak human girl. I could see him tip his head back and stare down his nose at her. Awesome, that was simply awesome. 

However, the lovey-dovey bit at the end. I'm a romantic at heart, but I can't see Sesshomaru admitting to caring or not deserving someone. I've already said it but, he is Lord. It made me cringe; Sesshomaru's kindness and Inuyasha's submissiveness. I don't like it, it's not them in my eyes.

Your writing was very, very good. You had some lovely descriptions in there. "The wind shifted suddenly, sweeping my long hair away from my face and bringing several new scents to my nose." was one of them. I love the image of Sesshomaru with his hair splayed out behind him like a cape. It's so pretty! A big thumbs up for including such imagery! 

Just a quick suggestion though: Add a little paragraph or two in the beginning explaining where Sesshomaru is. I got to the aforementioned bit and went: "Oh... So he's not lying in bed, unable to sleep." XD I'm strange, I know. Anyway...

Overall, I think I liked it. I'm not completely sure; I love the beginning up until when the demon was slayed, but then it swayed. Keep working on it. In terms of ICness, you've gotten about a 6/7 out of 10. Writing, 8/10. I can see the improvement from when I first reviewed one of your stories! Now... Let's see what else you've got around here.

Rin's Musings by Raven_Clover Rated: PG-13 starstarstarhalf-star [Reviews - 1]
Summary: Free- style poetry of Rin's musings. Each Chapter is a progression of her life.
Categories: General
Characters: Rin
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: No Word count: 152 Read Count: 1963
[Report This] Published: 25 Sep 2007 Updated: 25 Sep 2007
Reviewer: Lupi Signed starstarstarhalf-star
Date: 29 Sep 2007 Title: Chapter 1: The Little Girl

I admit, I was rather iffy with reading this. You often find badly written poetry (or I do in the least surrounding fanfiction. I don't write it (I don't have the poetic talk working for me in the slightest), but I know what I like. 

This is lovely. Not over the moon fantastic, but something you should be proud of. Your description is charming, pretty: "hair spun of moonlight" has to be my favourite line. And the line following it in which you describe Sesshomaru's eyes. Enchanting, that's what they are.

I have a bit of critique though; some of your lines seem to stumble, because either words are repeated too close to each other, or the line seems to go on for too long.  The second line and it's "still smiled all the time" is an example. It sounds as though you couldn't think of anything better to write and thus doesn't amount to the prettiness that most of the rest of the poem reaches. Perhaps you could say: But she continued to grin and laugh. Or something like it. 

But overall, I liked it. It's pretty well written. Lovely work, I hope to see more from you. ^_^

- Lupi 

DOG WHISTLE by jessicalp11 Rated: G [Reviews - 3]
Summary:

What happens when a accedent occures when inuyasha's beads brake? kagome brings something from her time that might just tame him. What could it be? READ TO FIND OUT!!


Categories: General
Characters: Inu Yasha, Kagome Higurashi, Kirara, Miroku, Sango, Shippo
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: No Word count: 205 Read Count: 2111
[Report This] Published: 27 Sep 2007 Updated: 27 Sep 2007
Reviewer: Lupi Signed
Date: 27 Sep 2007 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

... Erm. Okay. I like the idea, completely hate your execution. Basically, I love the idea of a dog whistle being used (why, I use it on the Sesshomaru in my head all the time), but this is sorely lacking in the writing department. 

First, your grammar/spelling. From what I can see, your grammar's atrocious and your spelling isn't fantastic. Please be sure to use a spell checker, and if you don't have one, find a beta to check over stuff for you. Your grammar (capital letters, fullstops, apostrophes and all that) isn't good. 'I' as in, 'I am', is -always- a capital letter. Capital letters should also be used at the beginning of all the character's names and the names of places.

Next, paragraphs are essential for a good story. When people are talking, paragraphs are used to show when a new person is talking, or to show when a nwe idea has been brought up or is going to be explained when talking normal writing. So, with the conversation between Kagomea nd Kagome's Mum, it'd look like this: 

"What am I going to do?" Cried a worried Kagome.

"Kagome what's wrong?" Kagome's Mum asked.

And so on and so forth... See how it makes it easier for us to read and understand? That's why the rule's there.  

Anyway... You said this wasn't completed. In what way? Is there another chapter and if you're adding more to this, why did you post it? Don't take my asking these questions as me having a go at you. Don't take anything I've said as an insult. You asked me to tell you if I liked this or not and I've always explained why I don't or do like things. I think you deserve to know why I think as I do.

Continue writing, I'm sure you can improve with some hard work and a little guidance. You're creative, I can see that from the idea you've had, however, you need to work on how you present your ideas. I hope to see more work from you, to see how you develop and improve. 

- Lupi 

Summary:

Sesshomaru disapears soon after helping defeat Naraku. Later, InuYasha recieves a stuning letter from his brother. What does it say? N' most of all how will he react and respond? WAFF,Yaoi,Anal,H/C,HJ,Lemon,MPreg,Oral,Rim


Categories: Adult, Angst/ Drama, Romance, Adult > Yaoi
Characters: Inu Yasha
Series: None
Chapters: 3 Table of Contents
Completed: No Word count: 6005 Read Count: 2902
[Report This] Published: 19 Oct 2007 Updated: 12 Dec 2007
Reviewer: Lupi Signed starstarstar
Date: 20 Oct 2007 Title: Chapter 1: Dear brother

*gasps dramatically* I know you!

But moving onto the reason why I'm here. I decided that I ought to broaden my horizons and despite my dislike for OOCness have a read of what your darling mind has produced. 

Your writing itself is pretty good. Not absolutely fantastial (I'm sorry I'm so harsh!), but it's much better than most of the things I read. I'd watch your syntax though, sometimes your sentences sound a tad awkward. But you said you'd improved as this story continued with the story, so don't worry too much about that. 

The only thing I can really pick at is the fact that the letter has nothing to signify that Inuyasha's reading it. I'd put either quotation marks or italize it, just so it's not so confusing. 

I must say though, I'm really happy to see tha tyou have good spelling and grammar; they're pet peeves of mine. I can't recall any huge mistakes (or any errors at all), so fantastic work on that.

I think Inuyasha's giving in too easily though! And that Sesshomaru apologised! Grrr... I'm hoping he'll go back on his words and be all like: "I wrote nothing of the sort, half-breed." But I doubt he will. UU; I need arguments! Shameless, stupid bickering! Please tell me there's bickering. *begs*

I'm eagerly awaiting your next update; I must see how their relationship progresses.

See you around,

- Lupi



Author's Response:

LOL I KNOW YOU TOO! I was like uhhh... O_o *scroll* Oh~!  Hahaha thanks for the review!

 Some of the stuff is copied and pasted from othersites that don't have that Italic junk so yeah, I'mma  bit lazy going through it and doing that stuff.

 Lawl, I'll try to make some bickering just for you since you reviewed hehe ^^; Might be some good parts for that coming up anyways.